Author Archives: Angie Tupelo

Pride events aren’t perfect, but they matter. Queer them up!

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“Because even if Pride doesn’t change many minds in the outside world, it’s our PARTY, darlings. It’s our Christmas, our New Year’s, our Carnival. It’s the one day of the year that all the crazy contingents of the gay world actually come face to face on the street and blow each other air kisses. And wish each other “Happy Pride!” Saying “Happy Pride!” is really just a shorter, easier way of saying “Congratulations on not being driven completely batshit insane! Well done, being YOURSELF!”

I’m not worried what the outside world thinks about the drag queens, the topless bulldaggers, or the nearly naked leatherfolk. It’s OUR party, bitches. If you think that straight America would finally pull its homokinder to its star-spangled bosom once we put down that glitter gun, then you are seriously deluding yourself. Next year, if one of the Christian camera crews that show up to film our “debauched” celebrations happen to train their cameras on you, stop dancing. And start PRANCING….

But sometimes I think we are the worst people in the entire world when it comes to standing up for each other. The gay people who’d like to soothe their personal image problems by selectively culling some of our children from Pride events? They disgust me. They appall me. They embarrass me. To them I say: The very road that YOU now have the privilege of swaggering upon was paved by those queens and leather freaks that you complain about as you practice your “masculine” and give us butch face. If you want to live in the house that THEY BUILT, you better act like you fucking know it. United we stand, you snide bitches. America’s kulturkampf ain’t gonna be solved by making flamboyant people go away.” Joe My God (emphasis is mine)

Thoughts on Mother’s Day

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“I am the woman I grew to be partly in spite of my mother, and partly because of the extraordinary love of her best friends, and my own best friends’ mothers, and from surrogates, many of whom were not women at all but gay men. I have loved them my entire life, even after their passing.” Why I hate Mother’s Day – Salon.com.

Charles Ramsey is still a hero – Salon.com

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“(T)he fact that a convicted abuser intervened to stop abuse is a good thing, not a scandal….To dismiss the character Ramsey showed in rescuing Berry isto suggest that nobody who’s ever done something bad should try to do something good, because the bad will always matter more….He did something heroic, and his past can’t change that. It only makes it more remarkable.”  Charles Ramsey is still a hero – Salon.com.

Basketball’s Gay Paragon – NYTimes.com

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Franki Bruni has a great piece in yesterday’s NYT, where he pre-emptively addresses his readers who “routinely tell me that they’d be less bothered by homosexuals if we’d just please shut up about it.”  A snippet is below, but the entire article is excellent.

“I’m a 34-year-old N.B.A. center. I’m black. And I’m gay.”

The gay part will now define him, in the public eye, more than any other. It will be the prompt for the loudest cheers he basks in and the nastiest jeers he sloughs off.

But in the opening paragraph, it comes after his age and occupation and race, getting no more space, in that one passage and for that brief moment, than other aspects of his identity. It’s a detail among many, but not the defining one.

That’s the integrated way that things should be, the unremarkable way a person’s sexual orientation ought to be lived and perceived. And that’s precisely what Collins and his fellow trailblazers are trying to move us toward: not a constant discussion of the rightful place and treatment of L.G.B.T. people in America, but an America in which the discussion is no longer necessary. He’s letting us focus on his gayness precisely so we can focus less on others’ down the road. via Basketball’s Gay Paragon – NYTimes.com.

It’s nice when we have good firsts…

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Today brings another first in American gay history: NBA player Jason Collins comes out and becomes America’s first openly gay and still-playing male major professional athlete.  I’m not really a sports girl, but this is a big deal and as a queer gal I’m grateful to Jason Collins for being brave enough to be the first.  I look forward to the day when this kind of an announcement is no big deal, and it’s people like him who will help us get there.

In his own words…

“But each time I tell another person, I feel stronger and sleep a little more soundly. It takes an enormous amount of energy to guard such a big secret. I’ve endured years of misery and gone to enormous lengths to live a lie. I was certain that my world would fall apart if anyone knew. And yet when I acknowledged my sexuality I felt whole for the first time. I still had the same sense of humor, I still had the same mannerisms and my friends still had my back….

Some people insist they’ve never met a gay person. But Three Degrees of Jason Collins dictates that no NBA player can claim that anymore. Pro basketball is a family. And pretty much every family I know has a brother, sister or cousin who’s gay. In the brotherhood of the NBA, I just happen to be the one who’s out.”  via NBA player Jason Collins says he is gay – The Magazine – SI.com.

Five Attributes of Trans Allies

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Reblogged from Matt Kailey:

Click to visit the original post

Last week in my Transgender Studies class, and also at a Diversity Day presentation that I made on the Auraria Campus, we talked about allies.

In my opinion, allies are an important component of any group. They add numbers, they add voices, and in some cases, they bring a certain amount of power that is lacking because of the way that a particular group is seen in the "mainstream," where the group is trying to gain at least equality, if not acceptance.

Read more… 1,075 more words

Loved the whole piece, especially "Being an ally is something that you live, not something that you turn on and off depending on the situation."

Toasting bread is easier with a toaster

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“Also, this is my least favorite argument against gun control. Guns don’t kill people; people kill people. Let’s replace “guns” and “kill” with other words and really expose how this argument falls apart.

* Toasters don’t toast bread. People toast bread.

Does that make sense to you? Do you see how awkward that situation is? Go try to toast some bread without a toaster. I’ll still be here when you come back with your cold, soft bread waiting for heat. You could go find something else to toast the bread if you’re so inclined. Stick it in the oven or put it on an iron or something, but that’s a lot of work when the toaster makes it so easy.” via Conservatives are saying this Sandy Hook father “owned” Congress at a gun rights hearing..

Back on meds, day 20, and they are working

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It’s been 3 weeks since I started back on Zoloft, and the initial side effects are definitely fading.  I feel like drugs are starting kick in already, but that might just be because the moodiness that made me want to stab everyone in the face is almost gone.  Still, historically I tend to start feeling some results in 2-4 weeks, the warm weather is making me happy, and so I’m not going to question it much.

Eating is still hard, really really hard.  I’ve lost 12 pounds since starting back on Zoloft and it sure as hell isn’t on purpose.  Tuesday evening I realized the only thing I’d ingested the day before was 3 cups of coffee, and that I’d only had a cup of tea that day so far.  (I am drinking plenty of water, not to worry.)  So, the “not hungry, eating is weirdly unpleasant” side effect seems to be WAY worse this time around, and that sucks.  I love food, cooking and eating out with friends, it’s one of my great joys in life.  I miss food so much, but even my favorite foods taste wrong or different or something.  EVEN CADBURY CREAM EGGS.  EVEN BACON.  EVEN KALE.  That’s just wrong.

If anyone has advice on eating when you really really really have no appetite and food tastes weird, I’d totally appreciate it.  I’m not averse to dropping a little weight but I’m pretty sure that the whole “calories, vitamins, and minerals are necessary for life” thing still holds true. I’ve got a doc appt on Monday so hopefully co can shed a little light on the subject or tell me to stop being so batty and move on with my day.

On Men Who Don’t Like Women in Makeup | xoJane

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“Most of the time, when men say they prefer “natural beauty,” they don’t mean that they’re ready for us to start leaving the house the way we roll out of bed in the morning. They mean that they want us to look perfect without appearing to try.” via On Men Who Don’t Like Women in Makeup | xoJane.